Returning to Work After Baby

Head Full of Doubt, Road Full of Promise

New focus and challenge with a brand new existence; a baby boy entered my husband’s and my life! Here I must fast forward, as this is my introduction to my family matters blog and our boy is approaching two years old soon. I am arming myself with all I can to share and explore – so much to learn. I am feeling like a new person who is so blessed and happily fumbling along. “Life is hard, you have to change.” A quote from one of my favourite bands, Blind Melon. All has been beautiful; the stress, the heartache, the joy of every moment and all of the challenges as well.

My dreams, my heart, my everything is so very complete as I married the most amazing person on Earth and we miraculously brought to be our perfect little angel into the World. I love them both so much.

We love and care for this boy and still manage to travel with our careers. I am content, somewhat, since we have incredible support and our boy is loved and cared for by family, while we work ever so hard to get on our feet whilst continuing our journey in our current career.

Whose head isn’t full of doubt? But I assure you, the road is full of promises ahead! I am experiencing this first hand!

Travel: after baby – bitter-sweet.

Bitter because I cry leaving my boy – the vision of him, his scent, the sound and feel of him. I hold him close and rock him as our heart beats coincide. I have sung to him every time I lay him down to sleep since the day he was born. I sing, “Leaving on a jet plane…” and I cry, because it is true…  I never let him know my fears and sadness. I will shelter him and protect and let him know only innocent joy, as he is so young and perfect. I am happy because he is happy with our Whanau: our family, who love him very much.

I feel driven to work as hard as I can for this family. Living on one income brought realities. I am now able to contribute towards our future. The best part: I can be there more than I thought – more than a “Monday to Friday” career would able!

Currently, I am in Dallas, Texas. I have been wide awake for weeks it seems. Bounced around the world quite literally. I am so sleepless that I am driven to write tonight. I am seeking some sort of grounding and refuge from the absolute chaos that is life sometimes.

My skin is getting older, it seems. Still traveling and watching many suns come up and down until the moon shows itself. Hours into day and night.

I have struggled to keep up with sharing this journey and have just been moving along; with friends, with a new love, who feels so comfortably old and experienced as if he’s been with me all along, and with travel;  essentially with life. I have to admit that this “one new experience a week” is a journey that I am failing at “documenting.” I am certainly enthralled in every moment, and I am trying, trying, trying to absorb and experience all each day presents.

Some days I live twice and some, not at all. Altitude is a master thief of time and space. (Prelude to my next blog).



  1. Igor says:


    Nice writing you did here. It seems you are all over the world, I would say it is a nice lifestyle. I recognize some of your internal things in what some of my friends went through in similar circumstances. I guess it is best to take one day at the time.

    Wish you all the best to you and your family!

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  2. shelley says:

    I went through just what you are going through! I had to go back to work cause one income just wasn’t enough. But it was the hardest thing I ever had to do! Leaving them crying at daycare as you walk away is brutal. So I too am working toward not having to do that anymore 🙂

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  3. Simone says:

    My husband and I were just discussing me most likely having to go back to work as it is very hard to make it with one income. My children are both in school full time now, although they are still young (6 and 8) and need adult supervision while not at school.

    The thought of dropping them off before school and having to send them to daycare after school is not something I want to think about.

    However, you have pointed out some of the positives. I want to be able to provide for my children and I was lucky to be able to have been home with them for their first few years of life.

    Thanks for sharing your story.

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    • Kimberley says:

      Hardest decision at any point, I know! On so many levels! Well, I wish you all the best! Know that you will make a good decision – step by step, things will fall into place. Thanks so much for the visit and for your comments. It means a lot to relate to others and keep on track.

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  4. donnacaliegh says:

    I remember that feeling. I definitely did not like having to go to work just so I could pay someone else to spend time with my little boy. It didn’t really feel worth it and I miss those years of being so excited to pick them up from preschool and how excited they were to see me. My kids are 9 and almost 14 now (this month) and while I might not have to leave them in a childcare anymore, I still feel like I work too much, even though we are more excited to get some time away from each other nowadays instead of being excited to see each other at the end of the day. Cherish every moment you have with him because sadly those cute and cuddly years don’t last forever. Hold onto that feeling as long as you can!

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    • Kimberley says:

      Wow! Two growing children – I am in awe of anyone who has two or more! One is pretty hard as it is. One of life’s most beautiful, sometimes heart wrenching, challenges! Challenges that bring many rewards 🙂 Wish you all the best and happy birthday to your 14 year old to be! Thanks for visiting and for your comments today!

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  5. buildyourpay says:

    really informative website nice smooth flow and easy to read and navigate . I think every mum has experienced the same so the topic is close to many peoples hearts . nice eye catching images and beautifully laid out , website domain is very catching too and will attract a lot of traffic

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  6. Holly says:

    Hi Kimberley,

    Your article is so beautiful and yet so sad. I really feel for you and the emotional longing that you must have for your son, having to leave him after being there with him every day.

    Although, your writing and style is really lovely and endearing. Some people think travelling all over the world is luxurious but it evidently has its drawbacks. Where do you travel to? Is it all over? Wishing you and your family all the best for 2016!

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